Yes folks, I have been gone a long while. For about the past year I have really not felt well at all. I found out I had Fibromyalgia. I had just recovered from an undiagnosed infection after having tissue expansion for breast reconstruction. Getting to the place where I actually had the procedures to reconstruct my breast took me from the year 2000 to 2007. Let's just say I have a serious distrust of Doctors. Then coming down with this undiagnosed infection gave me a bit less trust. Right after that BOOM, hey, guess what you have, yea that's right Fibromyalgia. The catch all illness. Great news that.
So, that hospital stay was 18 months ago. I've felt icky every sense but have been pushing through life with every effort to have a positive beautiful attitude. Six weeks ago I has a nice long two week hospital stay for a breast infection. I got better and they sent me home. A week later the infection was back worse than before. The Doctor, who by the way I do trust with my life, looked at me and said the fight is over and it's time to take the implant out. They admitted me to the hospital for surgery the next day. I stayed in for about 5 days and now have been home almost two weeks. I cannot tell you how much better I feel. My fibro symptoms are gone all but the fatigue. Which could easily be from surgical recovery.
I tell you all of this first to explain my long absence. Also to let you know that life after losing your breast, or in my case, your implant can still be beautiful. It is so beautiful to not have a constant high fever. To not have a red raised hot welt where my breast should be. It is so beautiful to wear clothes and feel beautiful in them. To have a future reconstruction to look forward to. To have a nicely shaped rubber boob to wear in relatively sexy bras until I can heal enough to have that reconstructive surgery. I know that I am sharing a lot with Yawl. If I can't share the bruises and bumps in my beautiful life, then I can't claim that my beautiful life is genuine.
Just know that no matter the difficult and ugly things you deal with in your own lives. You can choose to mold them into something beautiful. It is sad when we go through difficulty. But much like Scarlet O'hara I hold this to be true. As God is my witness, I will never allow myself to act ugly again. I choose to live a beautiful life.